Deprived

First of all I want to address, my essentially month long hiatus from posting! I’m not sure if y’all have noticed my absence but your girl is back! So let’s get into it…

To be deprived is to be starved of basic cultural, material and in this case, emotional benefits. The famous Sexologist & Author Shannon boodram quotes in her “Am I addicted to love” episode that “A deprived person isn’t a rational one”.

I resonated with that saying so much because it’s the truth! Starve someone of food and they will do unspeakable things to eat. Starve someone of their right to be clothed and they will steal to keep warm and dry. Starve someone of their right to be sheltered and they will squat in the most unkempt environments just to be enclosed within four walls for the simple means of safety. So for this post I would like to vent about emotional deprivation.

How many times have we given someone our attention, love and effort only for them to withhold theirs? They will starve you of your very desire to have every inch of them until your mind drives itself romped down every avenue of thought! I wrote a small spoken word about my experience with this very situation.

Deprive me of attention and I will seek it. Both, knowingly from you and subconsciously elsewhere.

Deprive me of trust, and the trust I had for you will slowly but surely dwindle away into nothingness.

Deprive me of respect and my compassion for you soon after becomes obsolete.

Deprive me of care and the taste you once left in my mouth turns me to activities that consist of: conclusion jumping off of Mount Everest & IG lurking because it’s free after 6pm EST. Time.

Lastly deprive me of a love that I know should be mine, as if the list above wasn’t enough. I mean really hold back. Give me River’s, valleys, lakes & streams of hope. Give me Costco sized hope. Ok I guess you get the point now. You’ve given essentially enough hope to last lifetime, so that the idea of this plane I’m on has ran its course on the runway and is finally ready to depart! Give me so much hope that your potential and promise of growth could keep my seat-belt on forever, or at least until you’ve decided that my destination was never an option; and where I sat with my seat belt secured, was as far as you would allow me to go.